Victor's arms come down from around him, one of them resting on his hand, and surprising him so much with the gesture that he almost pulls back, as though at reminder of his forwardness, with the pressure on his hand and Victor's heart beat under it.
(Again.)
Again bursts his heart, remembering for a too long, too sudden second, about Victor taking his hand and laying his hand over his heart when Victor was kissing him, feeling it pounding out a rhythm Yuri thought of belong to running, and skating. Not himself. It's softer now. Slower. But Victor's hand is there. Firm on the back of him, over Victor's heart. (And he's still not even postive how that's allowed. Not really. The words are there. But ... eveything else.)
Which only made more than not a little too self-aware that he's mostly laying on Victor, and that Victor did that, while Victor's other fingers pushed his hair back, only for it to come flopping, messily, forward again. It almost makes him sigh, want to grumble something about it, that his hair is always a mess (that he is), until his heart stops at Victor's words.
Victor's words that hit with so much more force than that photo. It's not the same as Victor leaving some tiny graphic beneath it. He sees it -- barely, rarely, sometimes -- in the pictures. There are posters. Banners. He's seen videos of his skates. Yuri never sees it in the mirror. Never.
But somehow Victor does?
At all, but -- now? Like this?
Victor who just goes on staring at him, making the back of Yuri's neck feel warmer the longer this pause goes while Victor seems to be just looking at him. Keeps staring, making him more and more self-concious, more uncertain whether to hold still or just put his head back down and hide from it.
Before -- Yuri doesn't even know how to think. Open his mouth. Victor? Victor feels like he got lucky? With this? With Yuri? That seems incredibly impossible, more like something Yuri should be saying. Should be asking. Has been asking since the second he could hold on to anything last night.
But not like this either. Not the way Victor says it. Not the way his voice ... It's light, happy and quiet. It sounds almost awe touched.
(Yuri's did not have those emotions.)
It doesn't change that Yuri's brow knits a little, his head finally dropping, even if that means he ends up with his chin and cheek slightly against their layered hands and Victor's arm. "Isn't that backward?"
The world certainly is going to feel that way, isn't? Just like his coaching?
Which Yuri had to wonder, suddenly, if it was even really allowed. What did this do to that?
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Date: 2017-05-17 05:34 pm (UTC)(Again.)
Again bursts his heart, remembering for a too long, too sudden second, about Victor taking his hand and laying his hand over his heart when Victor was kissing him, feeling it pounding out a rhythm Yuri thought of belong to running, and skating. Not himself. It's softer now. Slower. But Victor's hand is there. Firm on the back of him, over Victor's heart. (And he's still not even postive how that's allowed. Not really. The words are there. But ... eveything else.)
Which only made more than not a little too self-aware that he's mostly laying on Victor, and that Victor did that, while Victor's other fingers pushed his hair back, only for it to come flopping, messily, forward again. It almost makes him sigh, want to grumble something about it, that his hair is always a mess (that he is), until his heart stops at Victor's words.
Victor's words that hit with so much more force than that photo. It's not the same as Victor leaving some tiny graphic beneath it. He sees it -- barely, rarely, sometimes -- in the pictures. There are posters. Banners. He's seen videos of his skates. Yuri never sees it in the mirror. Never.
But somehow Victor does?
At all, but -- now? Like this?
Victor who just goes on staring at him, making the back of Yuri's neck feel warmer the longer this pause goes while Victor seems to be just looking at him. Keeps staring, making him more and more self-concious, more uncertain whether to hold still or just put his head back down and hide from it.
Before -- Yuri doesn't even know how to think. Open his mouth. Victor? Victor feels like he got lucky? With this? With Yuri? That seems incredibly impossible, more like something Yuri should be saying. Should be asking. Has been asking since the second he could hold on to anything last night.
But not like this either. Not the way Victor says it. Not the way his voice ...
It's light, happy and quiet. It sounds almost awe touched.
(Yuri's did not have those emotions.)
It doesn't change that Yuri's brow knits a little, his head finally dropping, even if that means he ends up with his chin and cheek slightly against their layered hands and Victor's arm. "Isn't that backward?"
The world certainly is going to feel that way, isn't? Just like his coaching?
Which Yuri had to wonder, suddenly, if it was even really allowed. What did this do to that?